Look no further! Sorry to all those who don't have kids and aren't interested in kid things...you may just want to skip today's post.
Before I had Preston, I started reading all the baby books and kid books and I just really didn't like them. They all had a certain flair about them....pretty much, if you don't give your kid enough attention, you will ruin their lives. If you don't do this....your child; ax-murderer. That's when I found my two favorite parenting gurus: Dr. Kevin Lehman and Dr. John Rosemond. I'm sure you've heard of Dr. Lehman, but you might not have heard of Dr. John Rosemond. His whole mantra is that parents today make their lives way way more difficult than they need to be by holding themselves to unrealistic expectations. Some of his ideas are so old-fashioned that you might be surprised, but they are rooted in the belief that you can raise a child who is respectful, resourceful,responsible and loving, even in this crazy world. Reading his books have been so encouraging to me. Mostly because they remind me of my childhood.
When I was growing up, my parents made parenting seem so easy. And I really think the reason for this was because....it was easier for them! They made sure that we, the kids, knew that we weren't the center of their universe. They loved each other first, us second. I remember asking my Dad one time, if you had to save either me or Mom from dying, who would you choose? "Your mom," he said. I pretended I was put off, but really that makes a kid feel good to know that their parents love each other more than anything else, besides God.
Anyway, by them showing us that their world didn't revolve around us, we learned to to play independently, think independently, read a book, play with each other or go outside and play with friends. I think these days we make things so hard on ourselves by making it our job to be "everything" to our kids. If you are everything to your kids, you are short-changing someone else, most likely your husband or wife.
So, I'll get off my soapbox but I wanted to encourage those of you who are feeling beat down by life, that it can be better!
Ps. John Rosemond has a column in newspapers every week. Here's the latest one that actually got me thinking about this topic:
http://www.rosemond.com/view/389/21753/Weekly-Column---93008.html
2 comments:
Thanks for today's entry! I have been feeling lately that I don't spend enough quality time with my girls, but when I read your entry today, I was challenged not to take the guilt that the enemey would have me try to accept. I spend every waking hour with my girls with the exception of a shower or possibly shopping (for the family) So, I was encouraged to give myself some credit and try to just enjoy life! Also, just to let you know, I went thru all your taste test tues entries and made out my menu for the next 2 weeks using them. I will probably wait on the muffins, until we go and get some apples! Thanks for the encouragement! Kelly
I'm so glad you feel encouraged. That is really how I've been feeling lately, like life is too short to have guilt on what I don't do. I just need to focus on the good things that I have done to improve my life or someone elses! Thanks Kelly!
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