Taming the Two: Part 3

If you missed the earlier posts in this series, click below!
Introduction
Part 1
Part 2

If you have an easy going child, the twos may not be a big deal. You might have a few bumps along the road but the road is basically smooth. If you have a child who in any way resembles a strong-willed child, you better put on your seat belt because it may be a rough ride! And that's why I'm writing this, for all of us who have those "spirited" twos.

It's not you; it's me.

At this point, I want to take a time out and say to all those parents who are frustrated with their twos....it's not you!!!! You might be thinking you are the worst parent in the world or if only you spent more time with them, they would act better. I want you to remember the way they are acting is no reflection on you. This is a hard age for even the easy going children. All of us are going to feel like failures when it comes to raising our twos but if we can somehow separate our self-worths from actions of our children, I think we will be happier. Just because you have well-behaved children who do no wrong doesn't make you any better than anyone else.

I used to be so upset about the way Owen acted because I thought that everyone was looking down on me. And maybe they were. But in reality, he is his own person and he is learning how to be a good citizen, he just chooses to take the harder roads to get there! That's just who he is and if I deny him that, it's unfair to him. He is not as easy-going as Preston so to expect him to act the same way as Preston is just going to bring heartache. So let's just take ourselves off the hook.

Look for the Positives

When your child is misbehaving, it can be torture. You just want to shake them and say "Why do you have to act like this??" One of the tactics I like to do is to watch out for positives within a bad situation. I know this is WAY easier said than done. Sometimes there are no positives to be found. And other times, the positives hit you square in the face like this:

Remember the spaghetti throwing incident I had with Owen recently? Well, while I was upstairs talking to Owen, a little helper was at work downstairs. I came downstairs feeling a little frazzled and I see Preston standing by the table with a cheesy grin on his face. "I took care of it," he said. Took care of what? Then I looked down and the spaghetti was gone! "What did you do with it?" I said as my heart rate began to climb. "I vacuumed it up!" he said as he held our new dustbuster in his hand. At this point, my heart was about to burst with love for this little 4 year old who stepped in and did something in order to make his old mom feel better. As I cleaned out the dustbuster, all I felt was love for my children and the creations that God has made them. Gone were my feelings of frustration. So, if you can, look for positive moments with your children that will bring you encouragement to replace your frustrations with them.

**During this series, I would love for people to comment on their experiences with their two year olds whether it's been 20 years since you've parented them or just yesterday. I think we can all encourage each other! So if you have funny stories or tips, bring em on!**